Today I visited the place where I have some very vivid memories of childhood...Jockey Hollow. It only took me 8 years of teaching in Morristown, and a new type of photography to bring me there, but I went... and it was awesome. So much of it was exactly as I remember it...and it gave me a warm fuzzy feeling inside to walk around by myself and take it all in again. Walking through the Wick house, seeing this strong foundation of American History and smelling the burnt wood smell of the soldier bunkers on top of the hill was such a great way to ring in fall.
I thought a lot about being a kid today. It all started this morning in Quik Check. It was a two-cup coffee kinda day, so as I was preparing my Limited Edition Harvest Spice Blend, 'Unwritten' by Natasha Bedingfield came on. I personally hate this song, but it's easy to sing along to. So there I was, walking around Quik Check (which usually has pretty awesome music to rock out to in the AM), singing this song as if I wrote the damn song myself. I personally apologize to anyone in the store at 9AM today. :) Anyway...as I'm belting out this song, I actually internalized the lyrics for a moment.
"Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips"
My first thought was "OMG! How true is this?!?" and felt kind of enlightened. I somehow went down the 'Why didn't I understand this when I was younger' route when it dawned on me- these lyrics are a crock of SH*T!!!! Okay, to be more intelligent about it, the lyrics can have very contradictory meanings. As a child you're told to do everything...how to dress, where to go, what to eat...Geez! You even have to ask to go to the bathroom!!! I can't even count how many times I got in trouble for not following the 'rules.' UGH! I even remember when I was learning to write, my teacher yelled at me for holding the pencil wrong-and I'm a FREAKING ARTIST NOW! Glad I didn't listen, I guess??? My point is, we spend our whole lives being TOLD how to live life and then this double standard comes in and asks you "What are your hopes and dreams?" "What does your heart tell you?" How can any person easily answer these questions as an adult after the way society raises us? Or...will they EVER be able to?
I consider myself lucky, I guess. My parents taught me to own my thoughts. I see people everyday ache for something else. They don't even have to say it, or even be a really good liar. I just sense it in people. My psychic hip. I embrace that I have the creativity to be different; and the peace of mind to be comfortable doing it. I used to feel cursed that my mind wasn't like everyone else...like I was crazy or something. Now, I'm glad it's not.
If I could wish one thing for all of you tonight (in this amazing thunderstorm, with a full moon and the official change of season-CRAZY ENERGY!!!) it would be for you to see the world the way I see it. You get glimpses sometimes when you see my photos, but if you could FEEL what I feel when I take those pictures...you'd be in a constant euphoria. Everything I photograph is with great passion and emotion. A story so to speak. :) Okay...tangent.
Back to wishes-
I wish for all of you to ask yourself "What is my heart saying at this very moment?" And hopefully you can muster enough clarity to hear it answer back. Believe me, it is! You just have to listen. Today my heart told me it felt pretty full...and it's been a while since it was able to say that! :)
PS- If you want to see the pics from my excursion today click on this link:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/lizziegrigio/
PPS- Yes, I really do wear Chuck Taylors to work. I'm the art teacher...I can get away with it! :P
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